Prior to getting sober my life was spiraling out of control. I was one bad day or negative thought from suicide. My relationship with my husband was crumbling because we fought over EVERYTHING. The way my face looked, his hand gestures, my hand gestures, even our non speak caused arguments. It was insane. My family life was falling apart at the seams and I was blaming everyone else and pointing at what everyone was doing wrong. When I knew that if I could just stop drinking and even remember what happened the day before things would be better. 

My drinking and drugging happened for a reason but my continuance of it happened because I liked the numbing of my feelings too much, I liked the FEELING the alcohol gave me ( to a point), I liked everything except the drama I created while using. I think that's why I believe I won't relapse because I like it to the point that I've envisioned that I will drink myself to the grave and that is enough to scare me into never drinking again. 

I'm going to do a bullet points of what drugs and alcohol took from me and then another of what Sobriety gave to me. Then I want to hear what sobriety gave you in the comments below.