Having self-love is important  for so many reasons. It can increase your confidence, self-esteem, and mainly the belief you have in yourself. 

In this post there isn’t going to be a video but instead I”m going to share my 10 tips to help you have more self-love. 

1.) You’re Enough

Whenever you’re feeling like what you do or how you feel isn’t ENOUGH rewrite that thought and say YOU’RE ENOUGH. I AM ENOUGH. I am growing as a person and will continue to be enough. This statement doesn’t mean that you stay in the life you don’t want or the mind that keeps you down. This says that you know you have work to do but I love me and I am working on me and that is what success is. GROWTH!

2.) Share your Story your Heart

When you can write your story and share that, it can be a very cathartic experience. It will also be very nerve wrecking but in the end you will feel a release that you’ve finally been set free from the burden you’ve placed on yourself. 

I remember when I first shared my addiction story boy was I a nervous nelly. I thought I was going to be received with judgement and shame and be called all kinds of names. In the end I didn’t care anymore and wrote my story and shared it and the comments and reactions or more positive than negative. I had some people stop speaking to me because of my views and opinions but that is ok. Not everyone is going to like you and that’s not your purpose on this planet. Your purpose is to share love and light and your story to help others grow and become better. 

3.) Engage with the outside world. (You’ll feel a sense of belonging)

I’m an introvert. So venturing outside is a rare occasion. Like seeing a sphinx. LOL ☺

But when I venture out to the park or libraries with my kids and see other adults and have grown up conversations or even speak to my friends over the phone I feel more connected than when I stay in my shell and exclude the world. When I exclude the world and the people in it I feel more depressed and like I have no purpose. But you do, we do and CONNECTION is what makes our world BETTER

4 & 5.) Be and Get  Vulnerable

As Brene Brown says, “This is the birthplace of everything”. (Vulnerability) 

When we can be vulnerable we can allow some things to shine that we normally wouldn’t. We show are TRUE selves when we are vulnerable. When we expose all of the places we’ve been hiding it will not only help you but it can help someone else that may be hiding too. So share your SELF and let people SEE you. 

6.) Release your armor

My armor used to be drugs and alcohol. It was a shield so I didn’t have to show myslef to the world and those around me. Once I released that false sense of security I was free from the shackles that kept me caged like a lion. I let my lion free and I shared my story, I got vulnerable, I made real connections and I’ve become a happier healthier person that I didn’t even know was possible.

Why are you holding onto your armor? What is it giving you that releasing it won’t give you? If you know it’s a false sense of security then let it go and BE FREE.  

7.) Talk to yourself like you would someone you love

We tend to speak to ourselves in such a shitty way that if you spoke that way to a stranger you would probably be punched in the face or called more names.  That’s why you should begin to talk to yourself like you would you Nanny, Gram, child, Mom, Dad, or even a stranger. Speak love into your life. Stop calling yourself dumb, stupid, not good enough, unworthy, and all that crap that comes up when we’re feeling less than. 

You’re not less than. You are worthy and you are ENOUGH. 

Start journaling and writing how you want to feel and speak to yourself instead of constantly how you don’t want to feel and speak. Journaling can and will make a huge difference if you allow it. Grab by journal and give it a try. 

8.) Let Go of perfectionism

Perfectionism is fear in disguise. Like so many other things that disguise fear. You having this thought that you can’t do something or release something or change something because the timing isn’t perfect, the month, the this and that is utter bullshit. It’s a story you’ve told yourself. An excuses you’ve created so that you don’t have to actually put yourself out there. Perfectionism isn’t real. It’s fear in disguise.  Let go of it and just do it. 

When I was afraid to go live on Facebook did i wait until my hair was done or my make up was perfect or that I had all the speaking knowledge in the world? No. Although some of those i did use as an excuse to not do it. But when I did do it it was such a release and felt so good. 

SO go out there and write that book, or lose that weight, or start that business, or drop that crappy boyfriend. 

Stop waiting and start doing!

9.) Be grateful

In my course The Shift Method and my Journal I use gratitude journaling as a way to get out of depression and sadness and into happiness. Because when you’re grateful about what you have you don’t tend to live in hate and fear and depression while in gratitude at the same time. When I’m grateful for my husband I can’t be mad at him too. When I’m grateful for my kids I don’t get upset over dumb shit they do (They’re kids) When I’m grateful I’m not sad and depressed over what I don’t have. I actually work that much harder to go get what I do want instead of thinking about what I don’t have. If you’re not living in gratitude then I would start journaling 10 things you are grateful for right now. Then Start The Shift Method course. The first 7 days are free. 

10.) Be Authentic

Be true to YOU. Don’t be something you think you have to be to get to where you want to go. You can still be you while growing into the person you need to be to get to where you want to go. That’s not being fake that’s called finding yourself. 

When I was getting sober  a lot of who I was and the beliefs I had changed and some people would say that made me a new person. But it just added to my already authentic self. For example, my beliefs about myself, Jesus, GOD, politics all had changed. When I released the armor of alcohol and drugs and really learned about my own values and what I aligned with people didn’t like that so they say I changed, which I did but I was still me but because I had views that didn’t align with theirs I wasn’t someone that they liked anymore. But what I’ve learned is my authentic self and values and views and opinions won’t align with others and that’s OK. I accept others and their views and opinions and that’s OK if they don’t like mine or me. I know they will see eventually that it doesn’t make us very different.  

I believe that if you’re actively learning then you are always growing because you will learn something that can make a shift in you and you whole belief system. So growth and knowledge and beliefs are fluid not solid. 

Summary

When you can put all this together that makes one heck of a power potion. Living your life without armor, false hoods, shame, with the knowing that you are enough, with gratitude, and authenticity that creates a life filled with real happiness, purpose, passion, and real growth and breakthroughs. It will even open opportunities that you may have not even noticed. If anything start by doing one at a time and then you will inevitably allow the others to follow. 

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